I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Why me? When I first think about this question my mind immediately thinks of people that blame God for the bad things that happen in their life. Perhaps people encounter misfortune, death of a loved one, or loss of a job. No matter what the circumstance, the question “why me?” is usually used lamenting that things have happened to you and not someone else. People feel that life has unfairly dealt them a bad hand and think that others are showered with endless blessings. Of course we know that it’s not true, but sometimes we question “why me?” despite our better judgment. I would like to put a completely different connotation to the question, “Why me?”
Sometimes I try to look at my life from the outside, you know, to see my life from a different perspective. This can sometimes be hard because I think we all get too caught up into our problems, hardships, or drama. It seems that people are often overly focused on themselves and don’t really think about what others may be going through. We are often selfish and forget how our problems can seem so minute compared to the plight of others. Taking a look at my life from the outside I see a 29 year-old woman that is a wife, a mother, and a daughter.
First, I see this woman as a wife that is married to an amazing man. She has a husband that is loving and supportive, and he always gives her the benefit of the doubt. He has faith in her and is always 100% loyal. He is her rock and he always comes through. He loves her despite her imperfections, and there are many. He has his imperfections too, but their differences compliment each other. Sometimes they act like teenagers, staying up late or chasing each other around the house. They laugh, they laugh a lot. They make fun of each other, and they have too many “inside” jokes to count. He has a way of calming her down, and setting her at ease. He takes care of her, he comforts her when she cries, he has a gentle way with her. There’s no doubt in her mind that she will grow old with him and that in good times and bad, he will be there. They’ve endured some difficult times, and they will probably face more, but they will do it together. They are soul mates, and they’re in this journey of life together. They are partners, and God leads the way.
Next, I see this woman as a mother. God has blessed her with two healthy children. She has two boys that are 19 months apart in age, and are the best of friends. They are beautiful boys, one with dark curly hair and hazel eyes, and one with light curly hair and dark brown eyes. The oldest shares a lot in common with her, he is sensitive, emotional, and extremely inquisitive and curious. Yet, he is methodical like his father and he loves putting things together and figuring things out. The little one is happy-go-lucky, a bit of a daredevil, but very smart. They are both really smart, there’s no question. They aren’t geniuses, but they absorb everything around them and they both talk non-stop. The older one likes building things and the little one likes destroying them. Despite their uniqueness, they always play together. The older one tries to boss the younger one around, but it doesn’t always work. He can be very strong-willed and he stands his ground. He knew the word “no” by the time he was a year old, and he says it to the older one very often. This woman has been given these two blessings from above, and has also been blessed to stay home. She is with her children every day, and although it is hard sometimes, she is so fortunate. She eats, sleeps, and breathes these two boys. They are her everything. They have changed her life in a dramatic way, and she is better because of it. Their bond is strong, and they adore one another.
Lastly, this woman is a daughter. In fact, her parents only live a mile away. Her mother is the most selfless person she knows. She is an amazing Nona to the boys and is always willing to drop everything for her daughter, or anyone else for that matter. She is always there to listen, since her daughter usually does the talking. She gives advice, and she doesn’t sugar coat the truth, she tells it how it is. She is an amazing Christian woman that puts others first. She can outwork any man, and she doesn’t have a lazy bone in her body. Not one. She is smart, her wealth of knowledge seems endless to her daughter sometimes. She doesn’t always express herself in such an obvious way that her daughter does, but she loves deeply and her loyalty is unwavering. Her father is who she looks up to the most. They have a common bond that is unique to them. He understands her like no one else because they are so alike. He automatically knows how she feels about a situation and what she is thinking. They are kindred spirits. He encourages her, motivates her, gives her advice, and sometimes a swift kick to the butt if she needs it. He helps her to look past what’s right in front of her and put things into perspective. She needs him. Although they may not talk everyday, they are still close, and she can always count that he will be in her corner. He’s always been her biggest fan. He makes her proud. She has seen him overcome adversity and she has seen him become stronger because of it. They often write letters to each other, and she cherishes those letters above any possession. Sure, he’s flawed, but he doesn’t act like he’s not, he knows it. Regardless, he puts God first and encourages everyone around him to do the same. He makes her want to be better, to do more, and dream bigger.
So when I think, “why me?” I think about why God has been so good to me. Why has he blessed ME so abundantly? I think about how privileged I am and how I don’t deserve it. Why me?
– Renae McAlister